oh, also gorgeous photo!!! i know you're in a difficult season with lots on your plate, but you truly look your best since I've known you (I mean this in a good way, because sometimes in hard seasons, we can't see our own beauty).
I really appreciate this because I happen to be in a season where it’s hard to look at myself in my face. I know I am healthier than I have been before but I am much older and more tired than I was before. It’s an odd thing to contemplate. I appreciate this compliment.
I totally agree. It’s a beautiful and endearing picture. And yet I also *get it* when it comes to looking at oneself. I’m finding it so hard post pandemic/babies/illness. Sometimes I can look at my face but my body definitely a work in progress. I think many of us feel the same way?
Wow! As my profession was originally an Executive Assistant this is incredible - honestly, it’s so good! If only half the people I’ve worked with were as organised as you 🙃 tbh though, many of the Chief Executives I’ve worked with and for were very organised people. It’s normally the teams under them they need access to these resources. Organisation can definitely be taught!
What I wondered though…(I am pondering the invisible mental load at the moment, for a post that may get written or may stay in my journal under “not sent letters” to…I’m not sure yet). How much of this energy, planning, organisation and level of detail and thought goes into this when it’s a heterosexual couple? My relationship with my partner is very “forward” (according to my Nan lol), but I just see it as a partnership and him being part of the family.
That said, there’s a huge and invisible list that I’m working on *all the time* and I just don’t know (yep I will generalise for a second) that men go into the level of detail required to run a home, on top of parenting. The reason I feel many systems are effective is because only one person is bringing more that 50% along to the relationship. Including my imperfectly perfect partner. (Insert guilt for writing any of this and it’s a perfect patriarchal cocktail 😩).
Really happy we connected in the comment section of another post. Once my children are settled in bed, I’m going to come back to your posts, there’s so much there I can relate to. I am super excited to have found your words on here ♥️
First, thank you for reading and I'm glad you've resonated with my writing!
Second, I think there is a lot of mental load on women to keep their family organized or to seek out these systems for help. If it weren't for my background owning a small business and now my background in my current marketing job, I don't think I'd be nearly as organized as I am. That being said, I repeat: I don't do all of these things. I sort of pick what I need as I need it.
In the past I've really struggled with the husband-wife dynamic regarding this mental load but most of that is from a lack of communicating proper needs/boundaries OR because I was raised to be such a "strong and independent woman" that I never heard about the very real and difficult mental loads being carried by men. They aren't equal loads but they are equally as important to acknowledge. Why I generally find my focus to be on one area of our lives, my husband is thinking in a different area. Not equal, but just different and both important.
I just know where my partner and previous partners have been concerned their stuff is very known. Either because it’s something being literally done, or they are going to work. I certainly empathise with their struggle and concur that it’s almost definitely about boundaries and communication. I was raised by a single mother so I get the whole “I can do it better myself” mentality too. It feels like the whole system is designed and set up to fail because the lions share (IMO) is done by the woman, it’s both free and invisible and maybe we’re the first generation to really be open about changing that. Every family and family dynamics will be different though and some may not even have this language to discuss it and/or want anything to be different. I just know that I’ll raise both my daughters and my son to be their best version and if they have relationships, of any kind, that it’s essential that person is able to show up too.
Such a good list & thanks for the shout out! I'm a big fan of the top 3 daily and the kanban method (except I use asana, and it's such a lifesaver to keep track of all the to-do's in my brain!). I need to be better about actually adhering to time blocks though and taking time to reflect regularly, so thank you for that reminder! I know how life giving those two exercises are, but sometimes I let "busy" keep me from making room for those.
Oh, i recently came across a new tool I'm trying out that I think you may enjoy too. It's called Poppins, it's a free AI home management tool. You basically sync it to your calendar and it reminds you of what's coming up and what to prep ahead of time. Super handy!
Love this! Not an organized person by nature, I appreciate this list and actually did not dismay at it! Sometimes organizing can seem daunting (most of the time) but I appreciate your heart behind what you write :).
oh, also gorgeous photo!!! i know you're in a difficult season with lots on your plate, but you truly look your best since I've known you (I mean this in a good way, because sometimes in hard seasons, we can't see our own beauty).
I really appreciate this because I happen to be in a season where it’s hard to look at myself in my face. I know I am healthier than I have been before but I am much older and more tired than I was before. It’s an odd thing to contemplate. I appreciate this compliment.
I totally agree. It’s a beautiful and endearing picture. And yet I also *get it* when it comes to looking at oneself. I’m finding it so hard post pandemic/babies/illness. Sometimes I can look at my face but my body definitely a work in progress. I think many of us feel the same way?
Wow! As my profession was originally an Executive Assistant this is incredible - honestly, it’s so good! If only half the people I’ve worked with were as organised as you 🙃 tbh though, many of the Chief Executives I’ve worked with and for were very organised people. It’s normally the teams under them they need access to these resources. Organisation can definitely be taught!
What I wondered though…(I am pondering the invisible mental load at the moment, for a post that may get written or may stay in my journal under “not sent letters” to…I’m not sure yet). How much of this energy, planning, organisation and level of detail and thought goes into this when it’s a heterosexual couple? My relationship with my partner is very “forward” (according to my Nan lol), but I just see it as a partnership and him being part of the family.
That said, there’s a huge and invisible list that I’m working on *all the time* and I just don’t know (yep I will generalise for a second) that men go into the level of detail required to run a home, on top of parenting. The reason I feel many systems are effective is because only one person is bringing more that 50% along to the relationship. Including my imperfectly perfect partner. (Insert guilt for writing any of this and it’s a perfect patriarchal cocktail 😩).
Really happy we connected in the comment section of another post. Once my children are settled in bed, I’m going to come back to your posts, there’s so much there I can relate to. I am super excited to have found your words on here ♥️
First, thank you for reading and I'm glad you've resonated with my writing!
Second, I think there is a lot of mental load on women to keep their family organized or to seek out these systems for help. If it weren't for my background owning a small business and now my background in my current marketing job, I don't think I'd be nearly as organized as I am. That being said, I repeat: I don't do all of these things. I sort of pick what I need as I need it.
In the past I've really struggled with the husband-wife dynamic regarding this mental load but most of that is from a lack of communicating proper needs/boundaries OR because I was raised to be such a "strong and independent woman" that I never heard about the very real and difficult mental loads being carried by men. They aren't equal loads but they are equally as important to acknowledge. Why I generally find my focus to be on one area of our lives, my husband is thinking in a different area. Not equal, but just different and both important.
I sure hope that makes sense!
Yes it definitely makes sense.
I just know where my partner and previous partners have been concerned their stuff is very known. Either because it’s something being literally done, or they are going to work. I certainly empathise with their struggle and concur that it’s almost definitely about boundaries and communication. I was raised by a single mother so I get the whole “I can do it better myself” mentality too. It feels like the whole system is designed and set up to fail because the lions share (IMO) is done by the woman, it’s both free and invisible and maybe we’re the first generation to really be open about changing that. Every family and family dynamics will be different though and some may not even have this language to discuss it and/or want anything to be different. I just know that I’ll raise both my daughters and my son to be their best version and if they have relationships, of any kind, that it’s essential that person is able to show up too.
**NOT** effective (I’m writing whilst in the maelstrom of before bedtime!!)
Love your organized perspective Chanel! And thank you for the mention 🥰
Thank you! For someone who is not organized all the time, I spend a lot of time collecting organization tips to try haha. Did you have a favorite?
I really resonate with finding your own rhythm 💕 I’m a major organizer so for me- it’s balancing out that side of me with the letting things be 🥰
Such a good list & thanks for the shout out! I'm a big fan of the top 3 daily and the kanban method (except I use asana, and it's such a lifesaver to keep track of all the to-do's in my brain!). I need to be better about actually adhering to time blocks though and taking time to reflect regularly, so thank you for that reminder! I know how life giving those two exercises are, but sometimes I let "busy" keep me from making room for those.
Oh, i recently came across a new tool I'm trying out that I think you may enjoy too. It's called Poppins, it's a free AI home management tool. You basically sync it to your calendar and it reminds you of what's coming up and what to prep ahead of time. Super handy!
Love this! Not an organized person by nature, I appreciate this list and actually did not dismay at it! Sometimes organizing can seem daunting (most of the time) but I appreciate your heart behind what you write :).
Thank you, Julie. I certainly wanted to give tips while also acknowledging no perfect system exists.
Also- what a seriously cute pic of you and your caffeine!!
That is super sweet! Thank you. The nonprofit I work for brings in income from coffee businesses to o support homeless youth www.thecoffeeoasis.com
Oh I love this!