How Do You Admit You're Depressed While Organizing A Mental Health Event
I don't really know.
What does it mean if I’m feeling depressed again? Does it mean I’ve failed at this mental health journey? Does it mean all the work I did in the past year is for nothing?
What does it mean if I find myself crying on the bed with my daughter after giving up on the umpteenth battle of getting her dressed? Does it mean I’ll always break down when it gets too hard to handle? Does it mean she might grow up thinking Mommy’s emotional state can’t handle her being upset?
What does it mean if I feel the resurgence of that dark pit feeling in my chest that has been a past sign of depression? Does it mean I’m depressed, or am I being expected to handle things that nobody can reasonably handle without stress anyway? (Like daily chronic pain, a spouse traveling for work the next four months, a significant amount of work pressure, and the stress of not living in my own home.)
What does it mean if I have organized an amazing maternal mental health conference and suddenly find I’m too mentally and physically exhausted to carry out some of the marketing plans I’ve established? Does it mean I’m failing at being a leader? Will everyone reject me? Does asking for help make me a laughing stock?
Here is what I do know: I feel like a massive contradiction right now. On one hand, I know I am capable, creative, driven, organized, and able to give compassion to others who are struggling.
On the other hand, I am exhausted physically, mentally, creatively, and emotionally. I don’t know how to ask for help.
God has a way of teaching me the same lesson over and over again in my life. I can make something good out of this hardship. He’s also continually teaching me it’s less about my work and how he’s working within me like an artist with clay.
Do you know why I wanted to create the 2024 Mental Health and Motherhood Virtual Conference? I need it for me, both the version of myself in the past and the version of myself now.
I want you to know you aren’t alone.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE. These contradictory feelings we get when we struggle as mothers are unfortunately common.
I want you to take one step this year in prioritizing your mental health even if that’s admitting to someone you’re not doing well. If we bottle up our rage, grief, or sadness, we will watch our bodies shut down.
I know this because I am living through it.
I lived a life of constant stress-neglect until my body eventually stopped functioning properly. Eventually, my nervous system stopped turning off and now I live in constant pain. They call it fibromyalgia but who knows?
I need to get back to basics and show myself compassion. While I’ve been busy advocating for others, I’ve struggled to advocate for myself. (Has this been you too?)
Are you laughing, God? Do you see me crying out for help while I write about self-compassion being the conference topic? Or are you looking at me as a pained parent who watches their child struggle with something that seems obvious?
I realize this is probably a poor newsletter to send out in terms of marketing, but if you’re new here, you may not know that I cannot stand to sugarcoat things. Live a life of gratitude? Yes. Sell you on something with a cheery attitude that this conference will make you feel amazing forever? No.
But it could be your first step to saying “I’m not doing well and I’m willing to acknowledge that.”
The goal of this event is for moms to hear from moms and professionals who are moms. You’ll feel less alone and maybe more equipped with mental health language. You’ll hear some suggestions on how to give yourself more love and grace. Mostly: you’ll be encouraged and feel held.
Everyone involved is doing this because they see the value in making maternal mental health an ongoing conversation that goes beyond a month of recognition or a doctor’s 6 week questionnaire before radio-silence.
We’d love if you’d join us in that conversation, too.
Yours, Chanel.
3 Things To Know About The Virtual Conference
No Hustle Culture: You can find a kinder way to treat yourself than by overloading your schedule with self-care that doesn’t make sense for your life.
Fits Your Schedule: Friday, October 11th is the day speakers and attendees login live but you’ll have plenty of opportunity to watch replays until the end of 2024. So go ahead and pop in during that 4 am nursing session if you need to.
Compassion-Oriented: 12 speakers with backgrounds in psychology, counseling, nutrition, movement, and more will guide a conversation on how we can have more self-compassion around motherhood.
→ Choose Your Experience
General Ticket: $25 USD
Live and recorded videos
Pre-recorded yoga session
Live chat and Q&A opportunities
VIP Ticket: $50 USD
Live and recorded videos
Pre-recorded yoga session
Live chat and Q&A opportunities
Join the VIP video group call with speakers
Get a name drop on the website or donate a free ticket to a mom in need
How you can share:
Share the website URL with mothers you know. We need your help to let other moms know a day is being dedicated to mental health topics for their benefit.
Share in your newsletters or restack and like this post ❤️
Print or share a flyer with your local hangouts where moms go (coffee shops, play groups, work places, libraries, etc)
Let moms know that community is out there and maternal mental health awareness affects all of us! This might be the first step someone takes to become aware of their mental health and feel connected.
Speakers For the Event:
Tanmeet Sethi, MD Amber Groomes,Ph.D. Lauren Barber Kathryn Barbash, PsyD Emma del Rey Jeannie Ewing Kaitlyn Elizabeth Krista Steele Heidi Schauster Naomi Gottlieb-Miller Kim C Dickerson, MS
The paradox never fails to surprise me in motherhood. We can be holding so many different emotions within a breath of each other. Your truth holds a beauty within it even if it feels wobbly. I hope you can see yourself through the medicine that you are showing others… with gentleness and compassion and love. What you are creating is so needed and I think we often bring to life just what we need (or needed) ourselves. One breath at a time. Thank you for welcoming me into the panel, I’m so honoured. Xxx
I love this.
And sharing this mostly means you’re a human ❤️
You created this gathering for mental health because you know first hand how it feels to be in the dark places as well as the light.
You also know some of the resources and people to call in for support.
All of that feels like a very balanced and grounded approach to mental health.
On a personal note, during the last week, I’ve barely moved my body. With long days of driving, hotels, unpacking in a new home — I just haven’t done much. And one of my big things is advocating for small doses of movement. But even I couldn’t manage it with all of that plus some personal stuff.
Part of me asked, “what kind of a movement pro am I if I can’t do the thing I advocate for and teach?”
My answer was, “human, doing my best.”
Gave me a bit of perspective.
Sending you a big hug.