Am I "just" a mother?
Tackling the myth that motherhood as a topic is less than.
Myth 1:
Talking too much from the lens of motherhood is a weakness and makes me “less than” as a writer.
Let’s dive in on this first false narrative I mentioned earlier in the post:
Even before my child was pulled out of my womb, I began writing about this great fear I had that motherhood would change my focus on things I really wanted to write about like mental health, faith, and business.
Now I’m looking back a year and a half later holding my palm to my forehead.
Duh.
Of course motherhood is going to change the focus.
It doesn’t mean you should stop pursuing certain topics or projects. BUT motherhood didn’t exclusively birth a child; motherhood birthed a mother. Therefore all the things I used to do and create have become filtered by this life-altering experience.
If I consider motherhood to be a weakness, what am I saying?
Physically, motherhood is not for the weakest of us. The act of growing a baby and then laboring that baby into the world is the hardest thing I could imagine doing.
Not to mention the postpartum and lifetime Olympic events of feeding, carrying, and nurturing that child, who clings to your body as their home; their safety.
Mentally too, motherhood takes a unique toll on us as we have to learn and adapt to keeping a human alive outside of ourselves. We struggle with the near constant and conflicting feelings of wanting closeness and being “touched out”.
We are expected to hold onto all the responsibilities of “before” and insert a whole new list of things to remember in the present. Whether it’s the structure of society or the nurturing nature of womanhood, we are mentally exhausted.
So, instead of asking why writing about motherhood feels like a weakness let us ask instead:
Why does motherhood as a new work/creative focus (or rather a lens from which all of our new experiences are filtered through) feel risky?
Why does tackling the things that are all consuming in my day-to-day life feel cringe when I lean into it?
If anything, becoming a mother has made me more empathetic, curious, creative, and strong. The strength required is seen in my sturdy arms from holding my daughter day and night and it extends like sequoia roots to support others around me.
Motherhood builds a web of strength, not weakness, in how I view the world. It brings clarity in my relationship with God. It branches into my roles as business owner, church goer, friend, wife, and daughter.
Motherhood is isolating but today, my friends, talk about it. Keep the conversation going.
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