Flexibility Privilege

To work or not to work?

This week has been a lab experiment in regards to where and how I get work done.

But before we dive into it, I need to acknowledge the fact I’m closing in on having more privilege than some with my new job and in other areas maybe it evens out? I’m not sure…it’s not about who is doing more in motherhood (although our brains love to take us there) but I don’t think there’s harm being done to acknowledging these disparities.

In short: this newsletter today is focusing on the fact I’m a hot mess express and I’m positive I am not alone!

Monday:

I woke up with a pain in my uterus which was annoying and unexplainable (or utters as my phone decided to autocorrect to my boss 🤦‍♀️). Thankfully I was not needed in person and could work from home.

I dropped off Eliza at daycare, had a phone meeting at 8 am and went to work on my tasks. This day felt monumental because I usually stay home from work only if Eliza is sick. Otherwise I power through it (completely my own character fault but it’s reality) because I love the work I do. I’m sure some Instagram influencers might come after me but when work has value behind it there is joy to follow.

A trip to the grocery store and going to a recovery meeting with Eliza topped off a busy day. I think I forgot to eat dinner.

Tuesday:

I returned to the gym for the first time since 2018! If it had not been for the fact I was staying in my county and not commuting the hour to work that day, this wouldn’t have happened.

Clocked in at a Starbucks nearby at 9am, conducted an interview at 11, drove to the new shop at 12, and whoops forgot to grab my marketing materials 🤦‍♀️ …Joey decided to handle the commute for me and I went to my parents’ home for dinner because it felt like it would be hard to parent alone that day.

While there I trapped with the guilt for not playing with my kid enough between phone calls about business and generally me sitting on the couch tired.

Wednesday:

Woke up at 3am with a sick kid.

This is the real challenge, where I have to get creative AND break past the Motherhood narratives I hold in my mind. All the stories I tell myself about how I should never want to work when my child wants me or how I should be the primary one to drop everything.

Naturally full of doomsday anxiety, I told Joey when he woke up from the sound of a cracker meltdown that “we had to talk.” (A cracker meltdown hereby refers to a toddler crying because she wants just one bite of each cracker and not the whole thing).

I had set up these meetings and Chamber of Commerce attendance for a month. I couldn’t miss them unless there was an emergency.

He decided to stay home with her until I finished at 3:30 pm, at which time he went to work for half a shift.

I’m grateful we worked out a plan that allowed both of us to navigate the workload during a sick day but here is where the privilege comes in…

Because I am guaranteed a weekly pay, can clock in anytime, and have a partner who can also be flexible; our day was able to stay on track.

Take away any of those factors and there would be a bigger problem: lack of support, money, or time. In fact, that’s where I had been for a long time before very recently when we joined another business to help them grow. I was the primary person who needed to stay home because Joey shouldered the primary means to make money.

That’s why I’ve been trying to create a more portfolio career, where our family doesn’t flounder when hard comes come financially.

My friend, Yelena, recently covered this with her newsletter A Portfolio Life (we’ve obviously been thinking similar things!). She’s a wife, mother, and works full time. How does she do it? Probably like the rest of us it’s a whole lot of prayer and adaptability. I’ll link her newsletter below.

Between the books I’ve been reading, the women I’ve talked to, and my own experiences this makes me think we have some future ideas to discuss.

1. Why liking work is a good thing

2. Experimenting with technology sabbaths

3. Networking tips for women

4. Building your skill umbrella

If any of these sound interesting, comment which one hooked you or give me some ideas of your own.

No 54. Growing your wealth during high inflation