Encouragement For The Mother Not Writing
Includes writing prompts for the mom that doesn't know what to write about and an invitation to help mothers be supported this October.
The Power of Words in Motherhood
“Writing is best seen as a lifelong lab experiment, where one can either play and delight in the process of trial and error or hide away their work into an unshared notebook of mere data collection. We must ask if we think the world ought to know and be inspired by our work, or if it was meant to be lost outside of ourselves.”
These were words I had shared a year after starting the newsletter, Motherhood Minute, but it neglects to mention a third, obvious option. You can express the messy, vulnerable, beautiful, mundane life you lead without sharing it outside the pages of a notebook. It does not need to be shared publicly nor does it need to be totally lost once the present thoughts have passed.
This is an invitation to write about the hard things, the beautiful things, yes, but also the deeply mundane things.
Write about how your house is never clean despite the endless piles of laundry and dishes you wash. Write the three sentences that documented you had five minutes until the baby cried awake after a night of constant caretaking.
Witness the days and weeks between the times you wrote in a notebook. Collect your random cell phone notes as historical fragments of the legacy you are building.
I invite you to practice this imperfectly: learn how to accept that plans will change and morning pages will turn to evening thoughts, or that the pages might go days or weeks without being filled.
Do it anyway. Act like nothing has happened and keep returning.
To practice accepting this invitation to write is to hold space for yourself. You are a mother. It is time to practice emotional resilience as much as it is to teach it to the children we raise. You don’t need to apologize for not having the capacity to create the way you used to or compare yourself to how “they” can create.
Who might they even be?
Writing Prompts
Identify who “they” are in your life. Who do you compare yourself to or imagine judging you for the things you’d like to share?
Do you ever censor yourself while journaling? How do you censor your experiences in motherhood to yourself, and to others?
Is censoring ever a good thing? Is it harmful to censor yourself? What defines your definition of “good” things to write about in motherhood?
Have you faced any trauma revolving around motherhood in your notebook? Is there something stopping you? If you pray, write your prayers in your journal and ask for guidance and healing. Meditate on scripture that comforts you.
Other things to write about (that were pulled from my own list for Substack. Tag me if you publish something inspired here):
desire to be consoled and mothered while being doing that for others
desire for someone to guide you in certain tasks
exhaustion of making decisions and not having time alone
guilt that comes with the motherhood journey and what that looks like for you specifically
idea rest must be earned